Green Hair, Three Swords WTF?
by spardasdaughter7
Summary: My response to Nadalada's challenge. I had a lot of fun creating this. Zoro goes to Middle Earth. Insanity ensues of course. No Romance.
1. Chapter 1: Prologue

"So this is Skypiea?" said Luffy.

"No. The Log pose is still pointing up." said Nami.

"Uhhhhh, guys," Usopp said. "Where's Zoro?"

The crew looked around the ship, and sure enough, the green haired swordsman was nowhere to be seen.

"ZORO! WHERE ARE YOU?! ZOROOOOO!" they yelled.

~In another world~

"Dammit! Where are those idiots?!" Zoro said angrily as he cut and pushed his way through the foliage.

He was heading towards the sound of running water when he heard terrible shrieking sound. He broke into a run. Then he found the river.

Galloping across the river was a white horse with a woman riding it. She had her arm around what appeared to be a child. She was protecting it. She stopped the horse once she was across the river and drew her sword. Her pursuers stopped at the river.

"You want him? Then come and get him." the woman taunted.

Her pursuers shrieked and started to make their way across the river. The woman began murmuring something that almost seemed like a prayer. Zoro ran out in front of her with his swords drawn, facing the strange creatures.

Before putting the third sword in his mouth he turned to the woman who had fallen silent and said, "I'll take care these guys. You take the kid and get him some help, he doesn't look too good."

The woman didn't say anything for a moment , then, "I'm sorry. I won't forget your sacrifice." she said before putting the horse into a gallop.

_'Sacrifice? What the hell is she going on about?'_ Zoro thought to himself as he placed his third sword in his mouth, more than ready to permanently shut these creatures up. Their shrieking was getting on his nerves.

"Heh, I'm going to enjoy this." he said. Then he attacked.

**There it is folks, the prologue of my LOTR/One Piece crossover. Please leave a review and let me know what you think.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Ring or One Piece.**


	2. Chapter 2: Hello Zoro

"It's extremely lucky that you brought Frodo here when did, I do not know for how much longer I would have been able to save him." Lord Elrond said.

"Yes, but there is something I'm worried about Father."

"What is it Arwen?" asked Elrond.

"There was strange man that put himself between me and the riders. He fought them while I was bringing Frodo here. I am worried about how he fared." Arwen said.

"One man willingly faced all 9 of the Nazgul?"

"Yes." Arwen replied.

"I will gather a small party to assist me in looking for him. If he is still alive I will tend to his wounds, but if he is dead I will bring him back for a proper burial. And will you stay here to watch over Frodo."

When he and four other elves arrived at the place where Arwen crossed, they immediately saw the man. He was lying on the ground with his feet in the river.

"Sigh. I suppose it was too much to hope for that he survived." said one of the elves. Elrond said nothing.

"Well let's take him back." said another.

But even as they were walking towards the man the air was split by a loud snore. They elves looked at each other then back at the man. When they got closer to the green haired man they realized that he was indeed snoring, and that he didn't seem to have any wounds.

They were only a few feet away from him when the snoring suddenly stopped and the man sat up and looked towards the elves.

"What the hell do you want?" he asked grumpily.

"Are the man that fought the the 9 Nazgul that were pursuing Frodo and my daughter?" Elrond asked.

The man looked confused, then he said, "If you're talking about those guys in the black cloaks who wouldn't stop that annoying ass shrieking, then yeah, that's me. What's it to you?"

"Then I would like to thank you. There are not many you would face the Nazgul of their own free will." said Elrond, bowing to the man, the other elves followed suit. Once he straightened he saw that the man looked extremely uncomfortable, in fact he looked like he wanted to get away from the elves as fast as possible.

"By the way, what is your name young man?" asked Elrond.

"Eh? Oh, it's Zoro." Zoro said, relaxing a bit. "Anyway you don't have to thank me, they weren't that tough. As soon as a few of them got injured, they ran away like cowards. I didn't even get to have any fun."

"They ran away? How is that even possible?" said one of the elves.

"Well, were on horses, so it wasn't that hard for them." Zoro said, taking the question literally.

"As far as I know the Nazgul fear nothing except their master's wrath." said Elrond. "So forgive us for being a bit disbelieving that the Nazgul were scared of a mere man. No offence."

Zoro shrugged. "None taken. But I if let second rate flunkies like that beat me, well, I'd never be able to become the strongest swordsman in the world."

"And how will you know when you're the strongest swordsman?" asked Elrond.

Zoro looked at Elrond with a shit-eating grin on his face. "When I beat the shit out Hawk Eyes Mihawk, that's when."

"Hmm, I'd like to ask you a few more questions, but it can wait until you are in the comfort of my home." Elrond said. The longer he talked with this green haired swordsman, the more curious he got.

Zoro stood up and stretched. "Well, you don't look like a marine, do it should be fine. Lead the way."

On the way there, Elrond let curiosity get the best of him. "If I might ask, what is a marine?"

"EH! You don't know what a marine is?!" Zoro exclaimed. Elrond shook his head. "W-well, you know what a pirate is, right?"

"Yes."

"Well marines are people who go after pirates to imprison or execute the them." Zoro explained.

"So, why would you be concerned if I was a marine?" asked Elrond.

Zoro smirked. "Because I'm a pirate."

"Is that so? Pirate or not, you saved my daughter and Frodo. As long as you don't steal anything you'll be fine." said Elrond.

"Nah, I won't steal anything. That's more of Nami's thing. Speaking of which . . ." Zoo trailed off and frowned.

"You seem troubled." commented Elrond.

Zoro just shook his head, "It's nothing," he said.

Elrond was still curious about this man, but he was satisfied for now. His other questions could wait.

By the time they reached Elrond's home, Zoro had fallen asleep on the horse he was riding.

_'This man seems to sleep a lot.'_ thought Elrond.

"Zoro?" he said.

Zoro woke up and looked around blearily, "Huh? Is it morning already?"

"I early evening, Zoro," said Elrond.

"Heeeh? Really?"

"Yes."

Zoro nodded and looked at Elrond's home, "EH! Whoa! You must must be loaded." Zoro exclaimed.

This reaction confused Elrond. In the following days Zoro visited Frodo and talked to the hobbit's friends. A couple days after he arrived, three hobbits, Merry, Pippin, and Sam, arrived while Zoro was outside training, along with a man named Aragorn. Zoro was also visited by Arwen, who thanked him for his bravery in facing the Nazgul.

The time was drawing closer for the Council that Elrond had called for, and the said elf was noticing something strange with his green haired guest. Elrond had come across Zoro several times since he first brought the swordsman to his home. In all these encounters Zoro was either wandering the halls, training, or sleeping, and each time he talked to the swordsman, Zoro seemed more and more distracted. He had asked several times if he was alright, but he always got the same reply, "I'm fine."

Elrond watched as the first participants took their seats. He sent one of his servants to escort Zoro to the meeting place. Almost all of the participants had taken their places by the time Zoro arrived.

"Ah, Zoro, I beginning to wonder where you were," Elrond said.

Zoro twisted his finger in his ear. "I got held up."

"He got lost." the servant curtly replied to Zoro's statement.

"OI! Nobody asked!" yelled Zoro.

Elrond figured, by Zoro's reaction, that this was a touchy subject. "Please feel free to take a seat," said Elrond gesturing towards the empty seats.

"Sure, whatever." Zoro said as he removed the swords from his waist and sat down on the ground pretzel style with his swords leaning against his shoulder. He paid no heed to the curious looks he was the recipient of. **(A/N: Sorry if this is a little OOC but it seems like something Zoro would do.)**

Elrond knew his guests would have questions about Zoro, but they were going to have to ask the strange man themselves after the Council was dismissed.

**Whew! First chapter done! I would have wrote a bit more but I didn't want you guys (the readers) to kill me for leaving you at a cliffhanger. Please review and let me know what you think. Constructive criticism encouraged.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece or Lord of the Rings**.

**Oh! And to those of you who read my story Smoker in Fiore, please bear with me a little longer. It might take a while for the next chapter to get out because I've hit a ****_bitch_**** of a writers block. Again, I'm so sorry it's taking me so long.**


	3. Chapter 3: They're Insane!

"Heh, so all we got to do is destroy it, right?" asked Zoro.

Elrond nodded his head once. "Yes. If we can destroy the ring, then Sauron will cease to exist."

"Well, what are we waiting for!?" said one of the dwarves.

The dwarf stepped forward and swung his axe with all his might. But it was all for naught as his axe shattered as if made of glass, and the ring was left unscratched.

Zoro had started to unsheathe his sword when the dwarf had attempted to break the ring, but sheathed it when he saw the dwarfs axe shatter. He was not about to break his sword, not if he could help it.

"If we could destroy the ring that easily, Sauron would have been defeated long ago." Elrond's voice didn't angry, if anything it sounded regretful.

"So how the hell are supposed to destroy it?" asked Zoro.

"It must be thrown into the fiery chasm from whence it came." said Elrond.

"Is that all? Sounds easy enough." Zoro said, cracking neck.

"It must be cast into the fires of Mount Doom." said an old man, Gandalf, if Zoro remembered correctly.

"So?"

"Zoro, Mount Doom is in the very heart of Mordor." explained Aragorn

"I still don't see how it matters." said Zoro.

"One does not simply walk into Mordor. It'd be suicide!" said Boromir.

Zoro looked at Boromir for a moment and the he grinned evilly. "Suicide, huh? Sounds like fun."

Everyone gaped at the green haired swordsman. However, the silence didn't last long.

"Gomu Gomu no, Rocket!"

Zoro immediately stiffened, eyes wide, then whirled around only for something to to slam into him. Zoro, along with whatever hit him, rolled into the table that the ring was on, almost knocking it off. then laughter could be heard.

Sitting in front of the motionless Zoro was a young boy wearing short pants, a red sleeveless vest, sandals, and a straw hat with a strip of red cloth wrapped around it.

"Oi, Zoro! We've been wondering where you've been!" he said before he continued laughing.

In sudden burst of movement, Zoro grabbed the boy by his collar and started yelling at him.

"GOD DAMN IT LUFFY! WOULD YOU QUIT BEING SO CARELESS AND WATCH WHERE YOU GOING FOR ONCE!"

All the while Zoro was yelling in his face, the boy, Luffy, had a big grin on his face. Sighing, Zoro put the boy down.

"Hehe. You missed a lot of fun, Zoro." he said.

"Oh, yeah? Like what?" asked Zoro.

Luffy opened his mouth to say something but was cut off.

"Excuse me, but who are you?" asked one the men at the council.

"Eh? Oh, I'm Monkey D. Luffy, and I'm gonna be the pirate king." Luffy said turning to the man.

This answer caused a bout of murmuring in the the people present.

"Oi, Luffy."

"Ha? What is it, Zoro?"

"Where are the others?"

"Huh?" Luffy looked around. "That's strange. They were right behind me a moment ago."

_'This guy's an idiot!' _thought everyone.

"Ah, that's right. You mentioned before that you were a pirate. Forgive my curiosity, but how many people are on your crew?" asked Elrond.

"Seven." said Luffy and Zoro simultaneously .

"Only seven?" said Frodo disbelievingly.

"Yep! There's Zoro, me, Nami, Usopp, Sanji, Chopper, and Robin. But we still need two more crew members." said Luffy.

"Two? I thought we just needed a musician." said Zoro.

"Yeah, we still need a musician, but we also need a shipwright so we can repair the Going Merry when he gets damaged."

"Oh, that's good! Then we don't have to worry about how long Usopp's patch jobs are gonna hold up."

Luffy then asked what was going on. After Elrond, Gandalf, Aragorn, and Zoro filled him in on the war against Sauron, 4 people and an animal showed up.

The animal, which appeared to be some sort of deer, started crying, as well as a young man with a long nose.

"ZORO!" they both wailed as they leapt on Zoro and clung to him, sobbing. Zoro, however, didn't much like being clung to.

"O-oi! Get of me!" he yelled as he attempted to shake the two off him. Luffy started laughing again. The black haired woman just smiled softly as she watched. A younger woman was glaring at Zoro, and a blonde man seemed to be ignoring the ruckus that was being cause by the other men. finally, the younger woman spoke.

"Zoro!" she yelled, gaining the attention of everyone present. She pointed her finger at Zoro.

"Your debt is now 500,000 beli!"

"WHAT!?"

"You still owe me 400,000 for the 100,000 I lent you so you could buy your swords, you also owe me interest on that, and the other 100,000 beli is for causing everyone so much trouble."

"Why you greedy little—!" Zoro cut himself before he could say something that would make Nami raise his debt.

Nami sneered and brought her hand up to ear. "Huh? What was that you were gonna say?"

Zoro's brow was twitching. "N-nothing." The he spotted Sanji. "Oh, you're here too, dartboard?"

"What was that you stupid moss-head?" said the blonde man his eyes narrowing.

"I said you have dartboard eyebrows, you shitty cook."

By this time Chopper and Usopp had detached themselves from Zoro. No one in the council could say anything as they watched the small but rowdy group of pirates, and as Zoro and Sanji broke out into a very loud argument. After a couple of minutes of the two arguing, Nami finally had enough.

"Enough, you two!" she exclaimed as she hit both Sanji and Zoro on the tops of their heads.

"Ahh, but Nami-swaaaan, that shitty swordsman started it!" Sanji whined.

"Same goes for you, you stupid cook!" Zoro said, his voice strained from pain.

"Why you—!"

"Don't even start!" Nami yelled.

"Hai! Nami-swaaaan!"

"Oi, Luffy." said Zoro. Everyone looked at him.

"Hmm? What?" said Luffy.

"There's a war going on in this country, and supposedly the only way to beat the leader of the bad guys is to destroy his ring," Zoro explained, indicating the ring. Continuing, he said, "And the only way to to that is to toss it into a mountain, which is apparently impossible to get to without dying."

"That so?" said Luffy, a large grin on his face.

"W-wait a minute Luffy! You aren't actually thinking of going are you?!" asked Usopp. Luffy's only response was to grin even wider.

"Looks like he really wants to go. *Sigh* I guess there's no choice." said Sanji, taking a drag of his cigarette.

"L-Luffy! Just think about this for a minute! Robin! Say something!" Nami begged.

"There's nothing I can say, Miss Navigator. If he decides to go, we have to go. He is the captain after all." said Robin, still smiling.

"So what're your orders, Captain?" asked Zoro.

"Yosh! Sounds like fun! Let's go!" said Luffy jumping up.

**I think anyone whose even relatively sane would be speechless at the Straw Hat Crew. Please review and let me know what you think.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece or Lord of the Rings.**


	4. Chapter 4: I won't ever get used to this

"W-wait a minute Luffy! You aren't actually thinking of going are you?!" asked Usopp. Luffy's only response was to grin even wider.

"Looks like he really wants to go. *Sigh* I guess there's no choice." said Sanji, taking a drag of his cigarette.

"L-Luffy! Just think about this for a minute! Robin! Say something!" Nami begged.

"There's nothing I can say, Miss Navigator. If he decides to go, we have to go. He is the captain after all." said Robin, still smiling.

"So what're your orders, Captain?" asked Zoro.

"Yosh! Sounds like fun! Let's go!" said Luffy jumping up.

**~A few days later~**

"OWWW!"

Sanji's foot was on Luffy's hand.

"Ow, ow, ow ,ow! Sanji, what did you do that for!?" questioned Luffy.

"Because you've already eaten your share and you shouldn't steal other peoples food!" replied Sanji.

"But I'm hungry!" Luffy complained.

"You're always hungry." Zoro commented offhandedly.

"Oh, you guys are so mean!"

A few feet away were four hobbits, one elf, one dwarf, and two men who sat gaping at the strange pirates they found themselves traveling with. Gandalf, however, was chuckling merrily. He turned towards Robin who was watching her crew with an amused smile.

"Are they always this lively?" he asked her.

"Mm hmm, of course. You'll get used to it. And if you think they're lively now, wait until they have a party." said Robin chuckling.

"I don't think I'll get used it any time soon." said Legolas.

"Well I wish they'd be quieter! At this rate we'll have every orc, and whatever evils that Sauron can conjure up, within a hundred mile radius attacking us!" Boromir hissed.

"I must say I agree with on this Mr. Boromir." said Gimli worriedly.

Robin almost laughed. "Oh, Mr. Dwarf, I wouldn't worry about it. They can handle themselves just fine. After all, Mr. Captain beat one of the 7 warlords of the sea, no easy task I assure you."

"Miss Robin, what you mean by the 7 warlords of the sea?" asked Merry.

"Well, the 7 warlords are pirates that so strong that the World Government doesn't want to waste the manpower it would take to capture them, so they make a deal with them. The World Government leaves the pirates alone in exchange for a portion of their loot and the occasional errand."

"If that's true, then is Luffy one of these warlords?" asked Aragorn.

"No. I don't think Luffy would accept the position even if it were offered to him."

"Why's that? Surely it would be easier for all of you if these marines left you." said Pippin.

"That may be true, but it would get in the way of his dream." said Robin.

"And that is . . .? asked Gandalf.

"He's gonna be the Pirate King." Robin said it in such a matter of fact of tone that it was if Luffy was already the Pirate King.

"How can he become the Pirate King." asked Frodo.

"The previous Pirate King, a man named Gold Roger, told everyone at his execution that if they could find his treasure they were free to claim it. They say he left it at the end of the Grand Line, it was they only place he could have left it. The person who finds Gold Roger's treasure, which has come to be known as One Piece, shall become the Pirate King. This was over 20 years ago." Robin explained.

"And no one has obtained his treasure?" said Sam.

"Well, the Grand Line is a very dangerous place. You have to battle other pirates as well as Marines, and then there's unpredictability of the weather. In fact, it's considered impossible to find the One Piece."

"That's quite a dream that young man has." said Gandalf.

Robin chuckled again. "Well, that's Captain for you," she said.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, a group of orcs appeared. All of the pirates froze. The others, however, placed their hands on their weapons before Gandalf stopped them.

"Wait, let's see what our guests do first." said Gandalf.

They listened but kept their weapons ready for use at a moment's notice. Luffy, Zoro, and Sanji stood up with smirks on their faces.

"And here I was just getting bored," said Zoro.

"Nothing like a little exercise after a good meal," stated Sanji, taking a drag off his cigarette.

"Yosh! Let's go!" said Luffy.

Zoro's smirk widened. "Aye aye, Captain."

And with that they charged forward with Luffy leading.

"Gum Gum—,"

"Santoryu—,"

"Party Table—,"

"Gatling Gun!" Luffy yelled.

"Tornado!" said Zoro.

"Kick Course!" yelled Sanji.

The group watched in amazement as the three men easily dispatched the large group of 50 or so orcs in a matter of seconds. Zoro sheathed his swords.

"Jeez, what the hell? That wasn't even worth the effort." said Zoro.

"Yeah, no kidding. I've seen some of those second rate marines put up a better fight than that." said Sanji.

"Man! Those guys stink!" exclaimed Luffy.

"Of course he would say that," mumbled Usopp and Nami.

"See? I told you they could handle themselves just fine." said Robin.

"So it would seem," said Gandalf, chuckling.

All the others were gaping at the three. Sanji turned to Zoro.

"23," he said.

"Same here," said Zoro.

"Hee, I got thirty-seven!" said Luffy. **(A/N: Frankly, I'd be surprised if he could count that high.)**

"SO COOL! YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING!" exclaimed Chopper.

None of the fellowship besides Gandalf could utter a word because they were so shocked. Nami, of course, was the first to notice this, and smiled at them sympathetically. (Actually, Robin and Gandalf were first to notice, they just didn't say anything.)

"Don't worry. I was pretty shocked at first too, you'll get used to it though," she said.

"I don't think I'll ever get used to this," said Boromir, weakly.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Rings or One Piece. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and please review. Don't worry, the next chapter will be longer.**


	5. Chapter 5: Of Swords and Crows

**Sorry for not including this sooner but is case anyone's wondering how the rest of the crew got to Middle Earth, the crew appeared there after leaving Skypiea. **

*Sigh* "I don't know how much more of this I can take," said Boromir, plopping down on the ground.

They had spent the whole day walking, luckily the time they spent backtracking to find Zoro was cut to a minimum by Legolas's excellent elf hearing. Eventually they had Legolas and Aragorn take turns walking behind Zoro to make sure he didn't stray away from the rest of the group.

"How on middle earth can someone have a sense of direction as terrible as yours?!" exclaimed Gimli.

"Oi! My sense of direction is just fine, you bastard!" yelled Zoro.

Gimli said nothing. He knew if he did the argument would never end until Nami hit them.

Zoro watched Boromir start to teach Merry and Pippin how to handle their swords.

'_Hmph, they're not that bad but they don't have any rhythm or style, they're basically just swinging their swords around." _Zoro thought.

He smirked as the three went from training to wrestling. It was amusing to watch the hobbits tackle Boromir to the ground. Eventually he started laughing. It was just too much, two midgets taking down a full grown man.

"OH MY GOOOD! ZORO'S LAUGHING! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" Usopp screamed while running around in circles.

The reaction of the others was much more subtle.

"About damned time that asshole smiled," said Sanji.

"Yay! Zoro laughed!" Luffy whooped.

"Eh? What are you guys talking about?" asked Chopper.

"Hmm," was all the reaction Nami gave and Robin didn't react much at all.

"That way of fighting is fine if you're using a shield, but you don't have one. Here, let me show you," Zoro said unsheathing his white sword.

Merry and Pippin exchanged glances but readied their swords. They were pretty nervous, they'd heard rumors among the elves that Zoro had fought all nine of the ring wraiths and survived without a scratch.

"Excuse me, but I believe I was teaching them just fine," said Boromir.

"Yeah well, I'm gonna do it now," said Zoro.

Boromir glared at him but said no more.

"Attack me." he ordered.

Again Merry and Pippin exchanged apprehensive glances, but after that moment of hesitation they rushed towards Zoro with a battle-cry. It didn't last long, within a second both of them were on the ground, groaning at the stinging pain where the back of Zoro's sword had hit them.

"OW! That hurt!" yelled Merry.

"Yeah, what did you do that for?!" Pippin yelled.

"You're gonna let pain stop you from attacking me? Perhaps you're just cowards who don't even have the right to hold a sword." challenged Zoro.

"Zoro, you're really heartless," commented Usopp.

"It's not my problem they're weak," Zoro said as he walked toward the rock he had been sitting on.

"Wait!" called Merry.

Unseen by Merry and Pippin, Zoro smiled, a cocky one, but still a smile. When he turned around his smile was replaced a bored, irritated look.

"What? You gonna bitch some more?" he asked.

"We're not done yet, and we're not weak!" said Pippin.

"That's right Pip, let's show this pirate what we hobbits can do when we set our mind to it." said Merry.

"HA, that's better!" Zoro said as Merry and Pippin rushed at him.

Again they ended up on the ground, and again they attacked him. This repeated several times until Usopp interrupted Zoro's own type of game.

"Hey guys, what's that?" he asked pointing at a black mass that was heading towards them.

"Ah, it's just a cloud, don't worry about it," Gimli said offhandedly.

"That's not a cloud," said Nami, slowly shaking her head.

"T-they're birds! Haha! And here I thought they were something bad!" Usopp exclaimed in relief.

"Yosh! Meat! Meat! MEAT!" Luffy cheered. **(A/N: Do I really need to tell you guys it was Luffy? I mean, c'mon! Who else would be yelling for meat?)**

"Those aren't just birds, they're crows of Dunlan! Hide! Quickly!" Legolas exclaimed.

Everyone scrambled to find someplace to hide, Usopp and Nami being the first to find sufficient cover. Luffy, however, just stood out in the open, looking around confusedly as the others rushed about to hide. Zoro, Sanji, and Robin were much more calm and dignified about their search for a hiding place.

Afterwards, Luffy was the only one left standing out in the open.

"Hide, you fool!" Boromir whisper yelled.

"Oh, are we playing hide and seek? You guys are really bad at this, you're supposed hide _after _I close my eyes!" laughed Luffy.

"What is that moron doing?" Aragorn hissed.

"Oi, Sanji! You think you make something good outta these birds?" Luffy asked.

"Of course I can, you idiot! I'm a first class chef!"

"Yosh! Then I'll catch some and we can have some meat. MEAT!"

Luffy jumped high into the air and laced his fingers in a crisscross pattern and threw his hands back, stretching as they went, and brought them forward.

"Gumo Gumo no, Net!"

The crows unlucky enough to be under his fingers were slammed into the ground, dying instantly. The ones that weren't slammed to the ground scattered in a panic to get away from this dangerous boy.

"Hey guys! I caught us lunch!"

"I'm glad he's on our side," said Pippin.

"No kidding, those devil fruits are something else." said Sam.

Sometime during the council, they had explained about Luffy's abnormal stretchiness. Supposedly devil fruits are rare fruits that give people powers in exchange for their ability to swim. **(A/N: This is actually kind of ironic for me because the Straw Hats run into devil fruit users all the time.)**

Sanji started preparing the birds with Luffy cheering in the background. He soon got bored with it and started playing with Chopper. Zoro decided to take a nap.

"This route is being watched, we must find another way," said Legolas.

"Let us pass through the mines of Moria. My cousin there will give us a fine welcome!" Gimli suggested.

"No! I would rather refrain from going through the mines unless I have no other choice. We shall pass through the mountains." said Gandalf.

"Oi, Ossan, why don't you wanna go through the mines?" asked Usopp.

"I'm afraid I can't tell you, young man."

**Whew! That took longer than I expected, but there it is. I really hope you enjoy it and I am going to continue The Demon Lord and The Heiress since it was a fan-fic I wrote in response to a request. And I will be writing another Fairy Tail/One Piece romance called Taming the Flames as a response to another request. So basically, I will write requested stories, but not ones I wrote of my own accord.**

**Anyway, hope you enjoyed and leave a review.**


	6. Chapter 6: Into the Mines

Nami, ". . ."

"Eh? Is this it?" asked Luffy.

"Looks like a cliff-face to me," said Sanji.

"T-t-t-t-this place is kinda scary!" asked Usopp

"Hmm, seem like we ended up coming here after all," said Zoro.

The Straw Hat pirates and the Fellowship were standing between a cliff-face and a dark lake. Where Gandalf said the entrance to the mines of Moria was.

"Hmm. There doesn't appear to be an entrance, are you sure this is right place?" asked Robin.

"Oh no, Miss Nico, the entrance is hidden. Dwarves are very crafty with stone," said Gandalf. "Ah! Here we go!" he said as he cleared away some vines, revealing intricate carvings in the cliff wall.

Gandalf spoke a few magic words and the carvings glowed with a beautiful silver light.

"So cool!" said Luffy and Chopper at the same time.

"W-w-w-what is that!?" exclaimed Usopp with his knees shaking.

Robin gasped nearly inaudibly.

"Whoa," Zoro and Sanji murmured.

"Wow!" said Nami.

**(A/N: I don't really remember this part so I'll just skip to the part I ****_do _****remember.) **"Speak 'friend' and enter," Gandalf read off the ancient carvings.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" asked Zoro.

"It would seem to be a riddle of sorts," said Robin.

"I do believe you're right Robin," Gandalf said.

Luffy went up to the entrance. "Hi there! I'm Luffy, want to be friends?" he said to the wall.

Nami and Usopp face-palmed.

"I'm not exactly sure how to be friends with a door though," he added as an afterthought.

"Um, Luffy, I don't think that's what it meant," said Frodo.

"What an idiot," said Zoro.

"Says the guy who can't even go to the bathroom without getting lost." Sanji scoffed.

"Did you say something, Curly-brow?" Zoro challenged.

"Yeah I did, what are you gonna do about it, huh, Shitty swordsman?" Sanji shot right back.

The Fellowship, having gotten used to Sanji's and Zoro's arguments, ignored the two.

"Aw! How come it won't work. I was hoping into would morph into a giant stone monster and I could get it to join my crew." said Luffy, looking disappointed.

No one could say anything, not even Luffy's crew. After he pouted for a few moments, he jumped on Sanji, distracting him from his argument with Zoro.

"Sanji! I'm hungry!" Luffy complained loudly.

"Well don't bother me about it! There's a lake right there, go catch some food if you want to eat!" Sanji yelled, shoving Luffy towards the black lake.

"It might be better if you didn't disturb the waters," said Aragorn.

Luffy, of course, ignored this advice and was even joined by Usopp and Chopper. The Fellowship still where having trouble with the whole 'devil fruit' thing, Choppers Human Human Devil Fruit especially. Gandalf sat on a rock near the entrance to the mines to try and figure out the answer to the riddle while Usopp, Chopper, and Luffy began fishing.

Robin was trying to figure out the answer to the riddle as well. She stood in front of the entrance and said, "Nakama."

"What does nakama mean, Robin?" asked Gandalf.

"It means 'friend' or 'friends'," said Robin.

"Well I'm afraid the answer may not be that simple." said Gandalf.

Robin merely chuckled. "Sometimes the hardest riddles have the simplest answers, Mr. Wizard," she said before leaving him to ponder her words.

"So bored! We're not getting anything!" Luffy complained.

Suddenly a tentacle burst out of the lake and grabbed Luffy's leg and jerked him high into the air. "WAHOO! Oi, Zoro! Nami, Sanji! This is really fun!" Luffy laughed.

He was soon joined by Usopp and Chopper who were frantically screaming.

"Looks like we're having octopus tonight," said Sanji as he kicked at two tentacles that tried to grab him.

"Looks like we don't have to worry about the Captain complaining about hungry he is." said Zoro. **(A/N: Why does it seem like Luffy's appetite is connected to strong he is?)**

Zoro severed several tentacles while Nami cowered behind the Fellowship. Robin crossed her arms over chest.

"Doce Fleur" she said, and four arms sprouted from each of the tentacles holding her friends.

As two arms pried the tentacle off Usopp, Chopper and Luffy, the other two arms grabbed them and tossed them to the shore. The arms on the tentacles disappeared and more arms sprouted on the shore an caught them, leaving everyone in the Fellowship gapping in shock.

Luffy stood immediately jumped after Robin's arm caught them. He threw his arm back, twisting it as it stretched.

"Gumo Gumo no: Rifle!" he shouted as he brought his fist forward and it untwisted as it slammed into the huge thing that burst out the water, instantly killing it.

Zoro dragged it ashore so Sanji could do his thing.

"Boy am I glad you guys are on our side!" said Pippin.

Luffy just laughed.

**~A few hours later~**

The Fellowship never would have believed that one person could eat so much, and in one sitting. Luffy ate so much of the monster that his entire body was swelled up. Even the hobbits were speechless. He even ate the bones.

"Ah! That was good meal!" Luffy laughed as he patted his swelled belly.

"T-There's not even speck left," said Legolas, horrified.

"The strength of a hundred men, and an appetite to match!" said Gimli, amazed.

"We need to figure out how to get into the mines, we've already spent enough time here as it is." said Aragorn.

"Gandalf, what's the elvish word for friend?" asked Frodo, who was standing next to Robin who was examining the carvings.

"_Mellon," _said Gandalf thoughtfully.

There was the sound of stone on stone and everyone stood and watched at the stone doors opened outwards. Gandalf chuckled.

"It would appear that you were correct Robin, sometimes the hardest riddles _do_ have the simplest answers." he said.

"Let's go inside shall we?" suggest Robin as she walked into the dark mine.

"Yosh, let's go!" said Luffy excitedly, following Robin.

Zoro and Sanji followed shortly afterwards, then the Fellowship went into the mine, leaving Chopper, Usopp, and Nami.

"Why did we let Luffy drag us into this?" they asked unison with tears streaming down their face before realizing they were alone.

"Wait for us!" they screamed, running in after them.

"Ah, soon you will experience the hospitality of the dwarves. This, my friend, is the home of my cousin Balin, and they call it a mine. A mine!" Gimli said as if the idea of it was preposterous as Gandalf lit his staff.

"This is no mine, it's a tomb!" said Boromir.

"No! No! NOOOOO!" wailed Gimli.

"WAHAA! SO COOL! Skeletons!" shouted an excited Luffy, not really understanding what the skeletons meant.

"Insensitive bastard!" Zoro and Sanji shouted at their idiot captain as they sent him flying into the wall.

Usopp Nami and Chopper screamed at the skeletons. Legolas picked up a stray arrow.

"Goblins!" he said.

"We should have never have come here!" shouted Boromir.

They attempted to turn back but it was too late, the ruckus caused by the Straw Hats and the impact of hitting the wall caused the ceiling behind them to collapse, leaving them with no choice but to continue through the mines.

**And there it is. I was hoping to get past the Balrog in this chapter, but I wasn't expecting the scene with the lake monster to take that long. So you'll have to wait unt—*Gets shot in the arm* OOOOOWWW! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?!**

**Angry Readers:*Menacing aura* Where's our Balrog fight?!**

**Me: *Cowers* I-I-I-I'm s-sorry! Please don't kill me!**

**Angry Readers: *All take out 12 gauge shotgun.**

**Me: Oh shi—! Gotta run, bye! *Runs away, leaving a cloud of dust behind her***


End file.
